The head of the Catholic Church has waded into the debate on fake news and he hasn’t shied away from getting his hands dirty. 

Pope Francis spoke to our religious affairs reporter at the Vatican;

“Writing fake news and stories about scandals is like being sexually aroused by excrement. And since people tend towards coprophagia, or eating faeces, then the media should avoid spreading it, he said in an attack on the spread of disinformation. Those who use their platforms to do so, rather than to educate the public, commit a sin.”

He then apologised for his use of explicit psychological phraseology that describes people who are sexually aroused by excrement. He continued;

“Spreading fake news is probably the greatest damage that the media can do. I have to say that I have begun getting my daily fix from the Rochdale Herald, it’s the dog’s bollocks for up to date news stories *thumbs up*”

He then followed through *phnar* with more sermonising on the miracles of Jesus Christ, the immaculate conception, transubstantiation, Noah’s Ark, talking snakes and a discussion of the miracles of Catholic poster girl Saint Mother Theresa of Calcutta.

This isn’t the first time that this Pope has discussed coprophillia and a sexual interest in faeces with the media leading many to speculate that he might have a “niche” interest in the subject.

Each to their own provided it doesn’t involve rape, or children, or both. Definitely not both. Stick with the pooh Francis then nobody can call you a pervert.

Unlike many in the Catholic Church…