News is reaching us from the House of Commons that Keith Vaz has been selected to chair the online porn regulation select committee.

It is thought he was chosen for the role because of his in depth experience of sexual deviance meaning he won’t have to do too much research into unusual sexual practices.

It is thought that the remit of the committee will be to define what is considered unusual, how this will be defined is as yet unknown, but given Vaz’s moral standards we’re fairly sure he considers most things normal, in fact it could lead to legalisation of beastiality and incest.

If anything does get banned you can guarantee that if there is a porn film with a plot line about a washing machine salesman buying drugs for rent boys it will be considered a normal sexual practise.

What will the government try to ban next? We’ve got a sweepstake running at the Herald and I’ve got a fiver on doggy style, let us know your thoughts in the comments or on Facebook.

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Dermot writes all of his articles in mixed media (mostly crayons and drool) he finds this style most fits his journalistic style, these are then sent to a room with 100 monkeys at typewriters, eventually something is published.