As the entire world struggles to unravel themselves from their twisted knickers following the surprise election of a sexist satsuma to the Whitehouse satirists have come under fire from Google and Facebook for writing fake news, otherwise known as fiction.

After a weekend of navel gazing the owners of several large publishing platforms, otherwise known as social media, realised that they hadn’t done enough to prevent right wing, politically motivated propaganda producers from installing a despotic demagogue to the US presidency.

“I blame fake news” said Zuckerberg “those clowns at The Rochdale Herald and The Southend News Network did this. We’re cracking down on ‘fake news’, they’ll be the first for the chop.”

“Eh?” Said Quentin when he heard the announcement. “What are they talking about? We write fiction, it says so on the website. Satire! This conversation hasn’t even happened, Zuckerberg didn’t say that, and I haven’t said this.”

We called Mark for a quick chat and during the call pointed out that he had accidentally handed governments around the world a propaganda super weapon and that if he really wanted to do something useful he could ask his mate Jack Dorsey to disable Donald Trump’s Twitter account. It’ll take him about a minute.

“Goebbels would have LOVED Facebook, apart from the jewishy bit. He’d have nationalised it and used it for propaganda. He’d have policed it too. No satire or criticism of the news or the government.” Quentin didn’t say during the call that didn’t happen.

Goebels said that “Truth was unimportant and entirely subordinate to tactics and psychology” sound familiar?

He also said that “it is the absolute right of the State to supervise the formation of public opinion” or was that Donald Trump or Mark Zuckerberg who knows any more?

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.