Conservative MP Stephen Phillips, who has represented Sleaford and North Hyekham, in Lincolnshire for 6 years has resigned.

The word in Westminster is the barrister and recorder is unhappy with the way the government are handling Brexit and is concerned that they’ve “lurched” to the right.

“When Stephen joined the right wing party in British mainstream politics and then campaigned to leave the European union,” said friend Quentin J Wigwams QC, “I don’t think he realised that any government he then represented would be a right wing one that was trying to leave the European Union. I mean who would?”

“Hold on,” said a friend of unelected, penis-haired PM Theresa May, “Isn’t he the one who threatened to resign if David Cameron didn’t hold a referendum because he wanted us to leave? Yeah, jog on, Phillips; door, arse, way out!”

To which Mr Wigwams said, “No, it’s because he thinks the PM and government are bypassing parliament! He says we swapped tyranny of Europe for tyranny of governments!”

“And he’s going to fix that by no longer being in parliament is he? Ooh, sounds like we’re losing a right brainbox, eh? Yeah, door, arse, way… I already used that o e, didn’t I?”

This is the second Tory MP to force a massively expensive by election in as many weeks while the media insists that Labour is falling to bits and the conservatives are unified.