Daily Mail Readers are confused that more unaccompanied toddlers haven’t walked the 2,000 miles to Calais from Syria.

Daily Mail Readers took to social media this week to ask why so few unaccompanied toddlers and infirm elderly have chosen to make the 2,000 mile overland journey from Syria to seek asylum in the U.K.

“It’s really odd,” Said Anita Wakefield from Britain First, “They all seem to be fit  and strong young men in their late teens or early twenties. Why haven’t more toddlers paid thousands of Euros to swim to Turkey from Syria and then walk overland through Bulgaria, Serbia, Hungary, Germany and France? I’m discusted.”

We asked one of the asylum seekers who made it to Rochdale how he came to be here. He told us;

“Haven’t you seen the film Sophie’s choice?” He replied. “Well it’s this story set in Auschwitz and a Nazi guard makes Sophie choose which of her children will die and which will live. Sophie chooses her son over her daughter because he’s stronger and there is a greater chance he will survive the war. It’s a pretty fucking miserable film and Meryl Streep kills herself at the end. It’s a bit like that.”

So there you have it. If families can escape together they do. If they can’t they club together to scrape together the funds to send away their sons rather than see them murdered or shelled whilst desperately clinging together in the rubble of lives.

Next week the Daily Mail will be discussing why more Syrian fathers aren’t handing their daughters over to people traffickers to get them out of Syria and an outrage feature about how vulnerable young women are regularly sold as sex slaves by people traffickers.

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Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.