Teenage child refugees completing their journey to the UK breathed a huge sigh of relief after being told they could remain in the UK until they could secure an appointment with an NHS Dentist.

“We can’t be sure how old some of these so-called refugee so-called children are.” A spokes-dickhead told us. “You can tell how old a horse is, sort of, by looking at its teeth. We should do the same with so-called human so-called children.”

Human rights campaigners were overjoyed at the news with one telling us;

“We had campaigned to say they should be allowed to stay until either Shergar or Lord Lucan showed up. But to get leave to stay until after you’ve had an appointment with an NHS dentist is much better. That could be decades.”

The good news is some teenage children are finally safe.

Get monthly highlights in your inbox

SHARE
Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.