Serial unproveable and unsubstantiated claim maker Anthony Gilberthorpe, 54, has come to the defence of serial gropist Donald Trump (at the request of Donald Trump) to cast doubt on the testimony of alleged Trump victim Jessica Leeds, 74, concerning her allegations that Trump physically assaulted her on board a flight in the 1980s.

Gilberthorpe first hit the headlines in 2014 for allegedly making stuff up about his job of procuring teenagers to attend sex parties for dead Tory politicians and influential business types in the 1980s (cough cough).

Why he happened to be sat opposite Mr Trump in a first class cabin on a flight in the 1980s (cough cough) has yet to be established, but Trump is confident that Mr Gilberthorpe’s memory is so crystal clear that he can remember every single detail of the flight in question, right down to Mr Trump not shoving his arm up Ms Leeds’ skirt, that he be considered a model expert witness of outstanding moral turpitude and not a dead shonky and disreputable Tory sex pimp in the slightest.

Concerning the incident in question, Trump has dismissed the allegations as ‘laughable’. ‘Seriously, would you? Just look at her’ he posited. ‘She really isn’t my type. I only rape hot chicks’.

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Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.