As part of her Key Note speech to the Conservative Party Conference today Theresa May is set to announce this explosive coup for the Torys & Brexiteers – Peter Andre is set to turn off the EU Lights by pressing the Article 50 Button on Oxford Street.
In a big celebrity event that is sure to draw giant, celebrating crowds he is set to be joined on stage by Debbie McGee and Dave Lee-Travis from ’70s TV show Rainbow. Earlier reports that the cast of Rainbow would be involved were quickly hushed after it turned out they were talking about Boris Johnson who is now universally known as “Bungle” throughout Westminster.
Andre, 56, is believed to have held off tough competition to get this prestigious gig with the Conservative Party equally ecstatic to have secured such as massive star.
Sources close to Theresa May said “There was only ever one choice for us; one man & one man only – Peter Andre” we were told.
“If there is one person who embodies the whole opportunity of Brexit it is Peter – an unskilled migrant single parent who is determined that no skilled, brave, determined & committed family men should be allowed to settle in Britain” she gushed
- After the button is pushed it is expected that the street party will go on all night with most of the acts that no-one can name from this year’s X-Factor turning up to lip-sync the Motown back catalogue and that Ealing High Street will be completely looted.
