An ancient Biblical commandment that has been left out of Bibles and Torah for thousands of years has finally been translated. 

Archeolinguist Barry Wordsworth told us: “Thescroll has been resisting translation throughout history because it seemed like jibberish. But now we know what Facebook is it finally makes sense.”

The passage reads;

And lo, ye utter flaxwits that put little crosses on thine comments on thee Facebook, the Lord doth especially detesteth! Ye shall not put kisses on it, ye thick fucks! Tis a comment not a love letter! For this sin shall ye be punished thrice that of the fornicator or commiter ofmatricide! You really pisseth God off!

Future editions of the Old Testament will feature the new passage just after the Ten Commandments of Moses.

Religious leaders around the world admitted to surprise at the passage but agreed that it was fair enough.

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When the aeons of war left the gods dead and the universe decimated, a single duck rose from the ashes and stood for justice and freedom! It wasn't me, that duck, but we look quite bit alike.