In a move that has shocked the world the shredded wheat headed presidential candidate Donald Trump has actually apologised for something.

His apology was aimed in the direction of some of the personal attacks he has made during his election campaign came last night in Charlotte and will have fuckwits right across America in a state of confusion. 

But they needn’t worry he immediately followed the apology with the sentence “I will always tell you the truth” which is clearly a blatant lie. 

As yet he has still to apologize for his blatant racism, gun crime comments, outrageous lies about his financial success, lusting after his own daughter, his hatred of Mexicans, Trump University, looking like an utter cockwomble and a whole host of other lies and general bullshitery. 

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Illiterate writer of nonsense. Great at headlines but tail off during the story ;-) Available for weddings funerals and kids parties. Never lie, or do I? Married to a retired supermodel come part time donkey racer. Will work for beer and crisps.