There was consternation in Whitehall this morning as details emerged of several international diplomats who may in fact be much, much worse than Boris Johnson at diplomacy.

A bewildered foreign office official

The Mexicans and the Saudis are currently fighting it out for the top spot as details emerge of a Mexican diplomat who has used diplomatic immunity to escape a child abuse charge and a Saudi diplomat who apparently has a slave and is, according to some sources, currently fighting allegations of human trafficking.

Russian, Chinese and Kazakhastani officials regularly use their diplomatic credentials to drive around London drunk.

You couldn’t make this stuff up.

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.